Five Hitman 2 Disguises That Shouldn't Work, But Somehow Do

Five Hitman 2 Disguises That Shouldn't Work, But Somehow Do

Agent 47 is a master of disguises, no matter how wrong a fit he is for them.

Spoiler Warning: There's not much to spoil about Hitman 2, but if you want to go into it totally blind on some of the disguises, then don't read this.

Agent 47 is a master of disguise, even when he shouldn't be. He's the sort of man who can blend effortlessly into any role, playing up each embodiment with constant winking about his true job as an assassin. He's an everyman with murder on his mind; the most generic dude to exist. He literally doesn't have emotions. He's the most obvious killer in the world, right down to the barcode tattooed on the back of his head. Still, as we know in the Hitman universe, people are idiots, and frequently fall for his distractions.

Still, there are some hits in Hitman 2 that make little sense, solely because Agent 47 frequently disguises himself as men who look nothing like him. Sometimes they're bearded, sometimes there's an age difference. Usually, it comes down to being a white man in a foreign country, from India to Colombia. He stands out like, well, a white tourist. Since that's basically what he is.

So here they are, the five disguises in Hitman 2 that shouldn't be foolproof, but somehow are.

The Drummer

In Santa Fortuna, Colombia, the drummer has a big task on his hands: getting the band back together. But first, Agent 47 has to dress up as the drummer. He finds him dead in a house, flies buzzing all around, possibly from a night of drinking gone wrong. Agent 47 is a sinful man, and has no problem wearing a dead man's clothes. With that, he trots around town, where the drummer's bandmates are passed out in various areas. Slowly, he wakes them all up, setting in motion the statue unveiling in the town square where a target will meet their doom.

The next scene, once the band's all back together, is truly hilarious. We're treated with a letterboxed jam session with Agent 47 patting on a drum, bringing to mind his other outing as a drummer in a past map from season one of Hitman. Only now, he's the lone white member of this band—and no one questions the band's drummer's sudden new appearance. He just blends in, like he was always a member of the band. No suspicions here.

The Barber

In the map of Mumbai, India, the slums are crowded and the bases are all heavily guarded. It's possibly the most dense map in Hitman 2, with tightly packed alleyways, underground (and above ground) bases, and quiet skybound walkways. There's three targets to assassinate on the map too, chief among them is the mysterious Maelstrom, who you don't even have an image of yet and have to investigate for their identity. It proves a unique challenge, but Mumbai's most glaring conundrum is that Agent 47 is the whitest dude for a solid mile.

No one in the world is as white as him, and yet, he can slide into any role effortlessly. One role is that of a local barber in the slums. He's scheduled to shave the Maelstrom, and through careful deducing, you eventually stumble upon him waiting outside of the shop. I waited patiently, never offering to shave any strangers who paused by my white barber. In the end, I got the Maelstrom in that chair and killed him effectively, dragging the body afterwards to hide so no one would stumble upon it. Shockingly, no one even noticed me dragging him away, despite the fact that the barbershop had no doors. Agent 47 is a master of disguise, again.

The Tailor, The Servant, Heck... Anyone in Mumbai Minus The Broadway Actor

Whether he's a member of Vanya Shah's Queensguard, a tailor scared of his customers, or a member of the Crows gang, Agent 47 is never questioned in Mumbai. It's almost like he had been undercover for decades, embedding himself in the community instead of knocking someone out and dumping their body in a closet while he stole their clothes. At most obscuring Agent 47's face in Mumbai is a pair glasses. Nothing changes the fact that this man is not an ex-pat. He's just a really bad liar who somehow fools everyone around him. As the Tailor, Servant, and many other roles in Mumbai he effortlessly slides into, he fools everyone. Except for Vanya Shah, who definitely caught me slipping poison into her tea and accosted me about it on the downlow.

Dale Anderson, The Mailman

In the quaint suburb of Whittleton Creek, Vermont, you might find a mailman roaming around. In my neighborhood, my mailman is a familiar face I know I can count on. He's always there, delivering mail and mixing up all the addresses on my block somehow; even then, I know him. In Whittleton Creek's suburb, I imagine the people who live on the leaf-littered streets know their mail delivery person too. Heck, if you stumble upon him having a conversation with a resident, they talk to him by name. (Good ol' Dale.) And yet, when Agent 47 knocks him out cold and wears his blue uniform, no one bats an eye. No one really questions him, or says, "where the heck is the usual guy?"

If this were an actual suburb, Agent 47 taking the mailman's place would be noticed immediately as suspicious. But that's apparently not the case in the confines of this Stepford Wives-ass place where most of the women wear 1950s-style dresses for some reason. When Agent 47 becomes the mailman, he is also defying the age old tradition common for mail delivery people: being old. He's not fooling me, even if he's fooling a tight-knit neighborhood no problem.

Sheik Zanzibar

Okay, who the heck let the Sheik out of Paris? The Sheik is one of the most iconic disguises of season one of Hitman, starting off episode one with Paris off with a bang. Somehow, the Sheik's now found his way overseas to… Miami, for some reason. It's a great nod to the Sheik's iconic role in streams and Let's Plays of Hitman, where Sheik Zanzibar transcended being just another pawn to get close to a target in Paris, and became a living (or dying) legend in his own right. Agent 47 is troublingly right at home donning the Sheik's clothes. And seeing the Sheik's return is like seeing an old friend. Now, if only I can actually find him on the map.

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Caty McCarthy

Senior Editor

Caty McCarthy is a former freelance writer whose work has appeared in Kill Screen, VICE, The AV Club, Kotaku, Polygon, and IGN. When she's not blathering into a podcast mic, reading a book, or playing a billion video games at once, she's probably watching Terrace House or something. She is currently USgamer's Senior Editor.

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