Tomb Raider Barbie Accessorizes Well with Death and Trauma

Is any other Barbie doll bundled with an axe? And if not, how come?

News by Nadia Oxford, .

By the time I was a little girl, Mattel was already pushing Barbie as an everywoman who's more than blonde arm-candy for Ken. "She's a doctor!" the commercials crooned. "She's a fire-fighter! She's a veterinarian!" All respectable professions, but it didn't stop me from throwing whatever Barbies I received from well-meaning relatives into the tree outside our house (my Cabbage Patch Kid suffered the same fate).

I think Mattel's latest Barbie doll can handle herself if she's tossed up into a tree, though. She's Tomb Raider Barbie (fire up that crooning commercial chorus: "~Tomb~Raider Bar~bie!~"), and she's ready to kill if her life depends on it.

Look at that face. No plastic lipstick-smeared smile here. Just steely eyes and a stone-serious face molded to resemble Alicia Vikander's (who's playing Lara in the upcoming Tomb Raider movie universe reboot).

Technically, she can still fit into your Barbie Cadillac.

The model Tomb Raider Barbie, revealed by IGN and currently on display at the New York Toy Fair, comes with a map, a journal, a doll stand, a Certificate of Authenticity, and an axe. She also comes with an expression that clearly dictates what she'll do with that axe if someone like my kid self tries to boil her, cut her hair, microwave her, or send her on a parachuting lesson off a 15-storey balcony.

Message received, Miss Croft. I'll leave you to your spelunking.

You can pre-order Tomb Raider Barbie right now. The doll releases on March 9, and you can take it with you to the new Tomb Raider movie when it premieres on March 16.

(Photo credits: IGN)

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Comments 5

  • Avatar for riderkicker #1 riderkicker 8 months ago
    Press Square to Sneak-Attack.
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  • Avatar for MetManMas #2 MetManMas 8 months ago
    I'm grateful that Mattel decided not to replicate the blood-caked waist piercing or the "Oh my God I just gorily blew out my would-be murder rapist's brains" expression when making Tomb Raider Barbie.

    But in all seriousness though, this is a really cool doll.
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  • Avatar for Fourfoldroot #3 Fourfoldroot 8 months ago
    Haven't played the shoot em up that is the tomb raider reboot for more than a couple of hours, doesn't really appeal, but isn't what she's holding a rock climbing implement rather than a weapon? Although it wouldn't surprise me if it was used far more often to kill than to explore in these new games.
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  • Avatar for Nuclear-Vomit #4 Nuclear-Vomit 8 months ago
    Great, now she can swan dive 2000 meters onto cold hard rock. Wait till you see the real ragdoll physics!
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  • Avatar for nadiaoxford #5 nadiaoxford 8 months ago
    @Fourfoldroot Axe or rock-climbing tool? "Por qué no los dos?"
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