Totally unbreakable. Totally insurmountable. Totally Master Lock.
Just make sure any pipes you jump down don't lead to the park's septic tanks.
Super Mario Bros. 2 is a major part of Nintendo's history, but it seems scared to dish out relevant nostalgia.
See the Nintendo plaque, $5. Touch the Nintendo plaque, $10.
Crystalis is also on its way to the NES version of the service.
If you're shopping for someone who still finds beauty in cartridges and pixels, have we got a gift guide for you.
You'll probably come in last at whichever game you're playing, but you'll look good while losing.
The gaming community knew nothing in the '90s, and frankly, neither did a lot of publishers.
As the NES Tetris community grows, newcomers and hyper-tapping players are rising to the top.
"After working on non-graphical stuff for so long, I took a moment to reflect on what I had with the visuals. It wasn’t great."
In 1982, Kirby assisted with legal gorilla warfare.
Erdrick's violent kids are about to run rampant on your Switch.
Nintendo tried its best to make the West love RPGs, but culture—and more importantly, timing—was against the attempt.
Earthbound's player guide is a great example of the effort publishers expended trying to make the West fall in love with RPGs.
The reasons Nintendo's online service is flaccid, and what it can do to pump things up.
Inti Creates boss would like you to know he's not working on it.
If you can't mix Super Mario Bros. with Billy Idol, then what's the point of life?
And publisher Limited Run Games says more are on the way.
They can manipulate the big guy into the most optimal run.
To be fair, losing your girlfriend to a giant ape will make you tear your hair out.
For a gang of idiots, they were pretty smart.
Not even DMCA Royale was safe from lawyers.
Those old Star Wars games can be yours if you're that attached to them.
The Link to the Past-Super Metroid randomizer mash-up is sure to be a blast.
Square Enix may have misplaced a few classic video game source codes.
From the NES Classic to the Sega Genesis Classic, we break down the best retro video game consoles you should buy—and which ones you should avoid.
The Angry Sun's relentless urge to burn has been replaced by a robotic drive to obliterate all living things.
What NES sprites have to teach us about the darkness in men's hearts, and more philosophy delivered in 8-bits.
A tale of two vampire hunts.
Anyone who says licensed cartoons were better in the '90s has vapor for brains.
Donkey Kong Jr. and two more games are coming to the Switch in May.
Like the Commodore 64 itself, its spirit will not easily fade.
A cartridge's save battery is finite. Just like a parent's love.
Some Final Fantasy games have remakes of their remakes. What's the definitive version of each single-player mainline installment? Let us help you.
Three new games headline this month's free NES classics.
Now I want to fight Ganon while listening to some Bonnie Tyler.
It's been 25 years since Mega Man 6 came to North America. Nadia plays it again to see if it deserves the thumping fans and critics tend to administer.
The "Moon Theme" is now an official part of Disney canon.
The high-priced Super Mario Bros. auction offers a reminder to treat all video games with respect.
A world record price for one of the most famous video games of all time.
Fingers crossed for Ice Climbers.
"Memento Mori" applies to video games, too.
When a game about an elf boy and another game about rampaging hellspawn love each other very much...
The "weird" Zelda game and an NES classic are coming to the Switch.
Visit eerie Minus Hyrule, where Octorocks moonwalk and graves stretch as far as the eye can see.
Brought to you by a Mac Plus, ClarisWorks, and no idea how paragraphs are supposed to work.
The Reagan administration's "Just Say No" campaign left out one particularly powerful drug.
You get a mess of NES games with your Nintendo Online subscription, but not all of them are worth your time.
It's "Save the Princess," and then some.
As part of the Nintendo Switch Online's Special Offers program.
From a horrible curse comes a symphony.
A beloved bit of game music crosses time, space, and mediums.
It's obvious! Right? Right??
The Famicom (and the NES that followed) was a game-changer. Take it from someone who was there.
Nintendo's mini-NES isn't the ultimate 8-bit experience, but it delivers ample quality for a reasonable price.
A Kickstarter campaign wants to give you reason to drag your Zapper out of storage.
The late Nintendo President has a presence on all Nintendo Switch consoles.
Fully updated! Your questions about Nintendo's new mini-console — answered!
STARTING SCREEN | Happy 30th anniversary, Castlevania II: Simon's Quest! You're not a perfect game, but you're a damn ambitious one.
Nintendo's classic sci-fi adventure can be a tough sell today, but it redefined action games.
Konami deserves to be singled out in the grand, ongoing discussion about video game box art -- though not always for the best reasons.
Sometimes this stuff was really, really cool.
Totally an innocent "Thank You" note and not engineered to tempt US buyers into crossing the border. Scout's honor!
Sign my petition to turn the national anthem into a single sustained scream.
STARTING SCREEN | Sometimes a real controller can make all the difference. Plus: Hail to the Hungry Crab, 7th Saga, and a new addition to the USgamer team!
You need to make a choice. What's it gonna be, kid?
OPINION: The SNES Classic (assuming it's a thing) is meant to capture a time in gaming history that was much more divided than the NES era.
To love video games as a child was to quickly discover that some game-makers weren't obligated to offer you a fun experience for your cash.
Bargain hunter Rene Nezhoda allegedly made a lot of money off old Atari games on Storage Wars. Get ready for an excited phone call from your grandmother.
"Chip shortages?" Still got 'em. "Games make kids violent?" Check. "Japan will eat American industry alive?" Well ... that remained in the past, thankfully.
With the Disney Afternoon collection around the corner, one YouTuber decided to upload camcorder footage of himself playing Chip 'n Dale. Hot tips and tricks within!
Zelda comes full circle.
Zelda II has problems, but it should also be praised for showing us a side of Hyrule we usually don't get to see.
Mega Man's classic adventures suffer in six sloppy mobile ports.
The USGamer team dishes on their most successful bargains for games and systems!
A look at the dicey boom-era games of ’80s Japan and the vanished studios that made them.
A decade of lamentations for a potentially brilliant service that never quite lived up to its promise.
It's not just artificial shortages driving demand for Nintendo's little collector's item.
Everything you need to know about the NES Classic Edition and its games.
Hints, tips, and everything you need to survive and get a high score in Donkey Kong, Donkey Kong Jr, and Mario Bros for the NES Classic Edition.
How to find warp locations and other hints and tips for Super Mario Bros 1, 2, and 3 on the NES Classic Edition.
How to find dungeons, heart containers, and rupees in Zelda and Zelda II for the NES Classic Edition.
Our mini-NES has arrived, and Jeremy will be streaming it for a few hours beginning at 1:30 ET (4:30 PT).
The ghost of Bob Mackey returns to tell us the haunting tale of an unbeatable (?) NES death gauntlet: Fester's Quest.
The USgamer team weighs in on the 30 titles included with the upcoming miniature NES, from crummiest to coolest.
How 2017's Western juggernaut can trace its family history all the way back to the frontier days of 1985.
This week on USgamer's classic gaming podcast, we look into two of the more memorable comic book games on the NES.
Nintendo's mini console certainly does what it's supposed to, but not much else.
The Mini-NES is cute, but the Mini-Family Computer is cuter.
Happy anniversary, Simon Belmont! Too bad your bloodline is as deceased as Dracula himself.
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